The Gentleman’s Guide to 
 Dirtbag Tricks – ‘I’m Not Looking for Anything Serious’

Ladies – you are in for a treat. Because in The Gentleman’s Guide to Dirtbag Tricks, Mark will demystify all the things single woman analyse and overanalyse about. In case you missed our piece commitment phobes and why they don’t really exist, we’ll sum it up for you: most men aren’t afraid of commitment, they just prefer to be single until they find the right woman. Like my fear of committing to a contract with my current phone provider, there’s that underlying fear that there might be someone/something better. As Jack wrote “If she’s your perfect girl, you don’t let her get away”.

So why do woman continue to date the guys to tell them ‘I’m not looking for anything serious’? Read on…

Words by Mark S

You spot him from across the room. He’s standing by himself but there’s a sense of
confidence in him. Suddenly, you both catch each other’s eye and exchange smiles.
You smile embarrassingly but he smiles charmingly. He begins to make his way over.

He begins by making a self deprecating joke to break the tension and smoothly
transitions into asking about you. He talks a bit about himself and it turns out, he’s
very interesting and he’s got a pretty fresh outlook on life. The longer you speak to
him, the more you become interested. Before you can continue; he cuts you off by
abruptly by saying: I’m not looking for anything serious”.
The confusing meaning of this statement has led you to become nauseated. You’re
confused of the meaning and you don’t know how to proceed. What just happened?

What it means: During the time of your short interaction, he already sized you up
and concluded that you’re not for anything serious. When a guy meets a girl, the first
thought that goes through his head is this: can I marry this girl? To commit to holy
matrimony is a heavy investment therefore the criteria is usually very strict. You
probably said something or he concluded something about you that disqualified
you from being his future wife. That’s it – you’ve been written off.

Being a guy however, he’s a greedy and would like to make the most out of a
situation so he throws out this fool-proof line: “I’m not looking for anything serious”.
Simply put, the meaning is this: I won’t marry you, but we can fuck.
By saying this line, he’s pretty much protecting himself from any future freakouts
from you after you’ve slept together and he still refuses to acknowledge you as
nothing more than a fuck buddy.

Why it works: this line preys on a girl’s misplaced and ambitious belief that they can
make a guy change his mind about the way he feels about her, if she sleeps with him
enough times. What the girl doesn’t see is that the more she sleeps with him, the
more he loses respect for her and becomes tired of her. Eventually, when shit hits the
fan, he pulls his ace out of his sleeve – “Did I not say in the beginning that I’m not
looking for anything serious?”
Thought so

Photo by Daniele Martinie – She’s based in Melbourne and available for portraits!