How to Deal with Jealousy

It’s not exactly a desirable trait but we all have it in us. Some say a little bit of jealousy shows that you care…you know, when your man raves on and on about this cool chick he works with who just so happens to look like Kate Upton’s stunt double. It may be just harmless flirtation (on her part) but jealousy can rear its ugly little head like an unwanted white head. In moderation, it may be acceptable but anymore than that a person can be possessive or even abusive. We all deal with jealousy in different ways but here we’ve asked our favourite guys to tell how to deal with jealousy.

Are you a jealous person?

Michael: Used to be. You realise its not worth it to sweat over these things.

Nick: I wouldn’t say I am naturally a jealous person, but I have felt those feelings. I think it comes down to how much you trust your partner.

Adam: Yes of course.

How do you deal with jealousy either from yourself or your partner?

Michael: I’m not sure that jealously was a good thing. I’m sure for some people they can use it to their advantage, but jealousy always lead to issues.

Nick: It’s a case by case approach, but I am the first to admit that I haven’t always responded in the most enlightened manner.

Adam: Jealousy is a ridiculous emotion and must be treated as such. It is merely your silly thought centre thinking you need something to be happy or complete. When the reality is you already have everything you need, you are already complete.

Is it okay to spend 1:1 time with someone from the opposite sex when you are in a relationship?

Michael: Absolutely. There shouldn’t be any reason not to. Trust playing a big part of it.

Nick:  Absolutely, but it depends on the context on the relationship and the level of trust between the couple. Most of my friends are female and a lot are ex lovers or partners and it wouldn’t work if my partner didn’t accept and trust me when spending time with those people.

Adam: That question is insane! In a utopian world there would be no jealousy and people would spend time with whoever they like. If your partner wants to be with someone else then they should be. Living a life of solitude from other people doesn’t add to a relationship it destroys it.

When was the last time you felt a bit jealous?

Michael: It definitely has been a while. Definitely from my last relationship.

Nick: Not too long ago. A woman I was dating was going out on a romantic date with another guy and it caused more than a little internal angst.

Adam: When I saw a picture of a beach today.

Is it okay to snoop? i.e Facebook stalk, check your partner’s phone…

Michael: No, not really. They have their own lives, as do you. There needs to be trust there, but also, if something’s the matter, both partners should behave accordingly and speak up about it. Again, its not worth sweating over. I’m not sure the added bonus of “controlling” helps a jealous person out or not.

Nick: It is never ok to snoop! It is a slippery path to take and it ultimately means there are trust issues that need to be resolved. I have experienced this and ultimately it was the beginning of the end. There are only a couple of extenuating circumstances that would warrant such an action.

Adam: Facebook stalking is fine, that’s public domain. Going through people’s private information like emails, phone, medical records, mail is a crime and a total breach.

Sometimes we get jealous of the babe who you think may be hotter/smarter/skinnier than you, the babe who just may be interested in your boyfriend. It can bring out insecurities we never thought would exist, I know. But you can compare yourself to another person and let jealousy unleash but know that if he’s still coming home to you, that’s all that matters. There will always be temptation, another lady vying for his attention. He’s a catch, which is why you got him.