‘So…What Do You Like About Me Anyway?’

Just like ‘What do you think of my (very hot friend) Rachel?’ and ‘Does this outfit make me look fat?’, it’s a question where full honesty will get you into trouble and not enough of it will also get you into trouble. What does she mean when she asks you why you like her.

People date for a plethora of reasons i.e validation, boredom, attention, to find a husband, to make babies…etc. So it’s no surprise that she could be asking you for all different reasons. The most common two: to filter you into a ‘good’ or ‘bad’ long term boyfriend category, validation or for an ego boost. Just to be sure, we asked our girlfriends why they raise this trick question in the beginning stages of a relationship.

Amy: I ask out of curiosity or because I’m a nutcase and I wondered why he put up with me

Viola: I asked to make sure if he likes me for the right reasons

Mariam: You can’t expect the question ever to be answered on the spot though. I wanted to know we were on the same page and find out if the person really knew me. It’s not a test (though my fiancé is the only one who has passed). I think it’s more curiosity and the need to understand what he is thinking. The answer my partner gave me were very..’me’. It wasn’t the standard response which can be superficial …something like you’re amazing. It was something that had real content.

Sarah: I asked because I wanted to feel secure, that he liked me. I wanted to know where I stood in the relationship.

So How Do You Respond?

This is the Hollywood rom com type answer:

Rosaleee: You have five smiles, Pete. One when you think someone an idiot. One when you think someone’s REALLY an idiot. One when you’re singing to Barry White. One when you’re getting all dressed up. And one when you’re looking at me.

It’s a bit over the top and of course it should be – it’s a movie. But it shows there’s substance beyond attraction, which is important because substance in a relationship determines whether or not a person is here to stay.

5 Responses to 1 Trick Question

If You Like Her But are Not Looking for Anything Serious:

Tell her how much you like her physical appearance. It shows that you liker her but mostly on a superficial level. It says: I like you but this is just fun.

2. If You Really Like Her:

Think of all the things that set her a part from all the other girls you’ve ever met. It could be the way she gets all the lyrics wrong in a song or her crazy obsession fro Justin Bieber. Showing her that you appreciate her quirks will make her special and that’s how everyone wants to feel.

3. If You Like Her and are Clumsy with Words:

Put pen to paper so you can map out exactly what you want to say, write it down, erase then do over. If you’re at a loss for words, find some quotes from her favourite book or movie and then personalise it.

4. If You Need More Time to Answer Why You Like Her:

Tell her that it’s a question that requires more thought and you want to put some time thinking about it so she gets the answer she deserves. That way, you’re not leading her on and you’re buying time to figure out why you like her.

5. If You Don’t Know Why You Like Her:

Then you probably don’t.

Photo Credit: Joshual Earle