Because Sometimes You Just Need to Ask a Guy…

Iona is a Wellness Coach specialising in relationships and dating.…

We don’t pretend to know everything, which is why sometimes you need to ask a dude…or three!

Who should make the first move?

Jack: Women seem to think that it must be men so we haven’t got a choice. I personally think that it can be either sex and am in no way offended if a girl approaches me, I kinda think it’s hot. Does it often happen? No. I only ever approach a girl that has given me the signal that she wants me too. If you don’t know what the signals are then that explains why no one will talk to you. Except creeps of course, they’ll talk to anyone.

Mark: It’s not a straight forward answer – this is how it works: girls usually give subtle hints to guys, whether it’s a glance or body movement to show interest. The guy just needs to be sharp enough to read and decipher whether or not a girl is interested. If he thinks she’s interested, he can go over and make conversation. The only time a girl’s ever made a move on me was when her friend literally pushed me into her. What a crummy friend.

Trent: Usually the man. Bit much to ask the woman to make the first move.

Do guys really enjoy the thrill of the chase?

Jack: Nope. I haven’t the time to chase and if you make me I’ll simply let you go.

Mark: Yes we do. Guys are ego maniacs and want to feel that they attained something great. The texting, the facebook stalking, the scheming with buddies…it’s all part of the chase. But what happens when you get what you want is another story.

Trent: Depends if the chase ends with: ‘I just want to take things slow’.

Why do (some) guys tell you they are not ready for a relationship then get a girlfriend/fiancee/wife the next month?

Jack:They weren’t ready to have a relationship with you is all. The next girl might have been a better match and thus they saw a clearer future with that person. No need to be offended, you just weren’t meant to be. The alternative is that he is a player and you just got played.

Mark:Because they clearly don’t like you enough all his time and effort or don’t think you’re marriageable.

Why do guys ask for your number and then never call?

Jack:Could be a hundred different reasons. Most likely; he got really drunk and forgot he met you; he had a few too many and couldn’t quite remember what you looked like so probably figured you were a hunchback; talked himself out of it because his dutch courage ran out. All alcohol related but that’s when most numbers are exchanged. I personally like to give my number to the girl, if she calls great, if she doesn’t, meh.

Mark: Because he just wanted to see if he can do it. He can play it out in his head: he’ll call, you’ll flirt. You’ll go to a park and spend an awesome saturday together. Next time you meet, it’s dinner and a nice glass of wine. You might stay over. The next day, he wakes up and realizes he over committed and he’s stuck because he doesn’t want to look like an asshole but he really wants to kick you out. Because he believes in karma, he know thinks he’s destined to be screwed over in the future by someone he truly cares about. Look what you’ve done. Yup, best not to call.

Trent: Sympathy gesture. The woman’s name is probably filed in the contact list titled: Only Slightly Better Than Stumbling Home Drunk and Having a…

On the first date, who should pay?

Jack: Depends on the scenario. It should be the person who sets the date, guy or girl. If I ask a girl out i will pay no question. She should offer but i kindly decline. She should then offer to get it next time… nice line to get the followup date. But girls if you aren’t interested at all you should probably insist on paying half so its clear that this is the first and last date. There is no feeling of obligation and he(some guys) won’t think he’s paid for a kiss. Sad mind frame but some idiot’s think like this.

Mark:Guys 100% but girls should pretend to reach into their purse. Just pretend.

Trent: This is to be determined by calculating the girl’s weight in kilograms against the dollar amount of the bill, then multiplying the difference by two. Such a calculation is sure to produce an equitable agreement that compensates the man for any loss of self-respect/reputation should he find himself courting a whale. This division of expenses also ensures that cost is relative to total calories consumed, which will only lead to a disproportionate outcome if the girl is a fatty. Editor Note: He’s clearly kidding.